Journalist Quotes

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Abigail Van Buren If we could sell our experiences for what they cost us, we... Alexander Chase To understand is to forgive, even oneself.... Alexander Chase A soft refusal is not always taken, but a rude one is imme... Alexander Chase More and more people care about religious tolerance as few... Alexander Chase The most imaginative people are the most credulous, for th... Alexander Chase When a machine begins to run without human aid, it is time... Ambrose Bierce The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor... Ambrose Bierce Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who ... Ambrose Bierce Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtu... Ambrose Bierce Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.... Ambrose Bierce Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum - I think that I think, ther... Ambrose Bierce Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolon... Ambrose Bierce In our civilization, and under our republican form of gove... Ambrose Bierce Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resembl... Ambrose Bierce Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.... Ambrose Bierce The covers of this book are too far apart.... Ambrose Bierce Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech... Ambrose Bierce Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit with... Ambrose Bierce Childhood: the period of human life intermediate between t... Ambrose Bierce Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosop... Ambrose Bierce Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of... Ambrose Bierce Mammon, n.: The god of the world's leading religion.... Ambrose Bierce Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his ... Ambrose Bierce Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the stud... Ambrose Bierce Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplati... Ambrose Bierce The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own ... Ambrose Bierce Liberty: One of Imagination's most precious possessions.... Ambrose Bierce Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a wor... Ambrose Bierce Cabbage: a familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as larg... Ambrose Bierce Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual inde... Ambrose Bierce Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consist... Ambrose Bierce Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind he... Ambrose Bierce Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feel... Ambrose Bierce Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a w... Ambrose Bierce Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to ... Ambrose Bierce Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instructi... Ambrose Bierce Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing e... Ambrose Bierce Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest ... Ambrose Bierce Land: A part of the earth's surface, considered as propert... Ambrose Bierce Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.... Ambrose Bierce Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates so... Ambrose Bierce Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accorda... Ambrose Bierce Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.... Ambrose Bierce We submit to the majority because we have to. But we are n... Ambrose Bierce Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of d... Ambrose Bierce Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of puttin... Ambrose Bierce Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and... Ambrose Bierce History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly uni... Ambrose Bierce Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words o... Ambrose Bierce Consult: To seek approval for a course of action already d... Ambrose Bierce Ability is commonly found to consist mainly in a high degr... Ambrose Bierce I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said... Ambrose Bierce Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excus... Ambrose Bierce Who never doubted, never half believed. Where doubt is, th... Ambrose Bierce A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist... Ambrose Bierce Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingne... Ambrose Bierce When you doubt, abstain.... Ambrose Bierce It is evident that skepticism, while it makes no actual ch... Ambrose Bierce Doubt begins only at the last frontiers of what is possibl... Ambrose Bierce Doubt is the father of invention.... Ambrose Bierce Immortality: A toy which people cry for, And on their knee... Ambrose Bierce Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come ... Ambrose Bierce Absence blots people out. We really have no absent friends... Ambrose Bierce I believe we shall come to care about people less and less... Ambrose Bierce The best thing to do with the best things in life is to gi... Ambrose Bierce We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of t... Ambrose Bierce All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is ... Ambrose Bierce The small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify w... Ambrose Bierce There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, ju... Ambrose Bierce Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.... Ambrose Bierce Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow ... Ambrose Bierce Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.... Ambrose Bierce Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignor... Ambrose Bierce Optimism: The doctrine that everything is beautiful, inclu... Ambrose Bierce Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renoun... Ambrose Bierce An egotist is a person of low taste-more interested in him... Ambrose Bierce Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an... Ambrose Bierce Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in pl... Ambrose Bierce Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over th... Ambrose Bierce Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the... Ambrose Bierce To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice... Ambrose Bierce Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled... Ambrose Bierce Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients a... Ambrose Bierce Revolution, n. In politics, an abrupt change in the form o... Ambrose Bierce A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything but ... Ambrose Bierce Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsiste... Ambrose Bierce Ambidextrous, adj.: Able to pick with equal skill a right-... Ambrose Bierce Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary al... Ambrose Bierce Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a ... Ambrose Bierce Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the p... Ambrose Bierce Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as ... Ambrose Bierce Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to dete... Ambrose Bierce Education, n.: That which discloses the wise and disguises... Ambrose Bierce Egotism, n: Doing the New York Times crossword puzzle with... Ambrose Bierce Egotist: A person of low taste, more interested in himself... Ambrose Bierce Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.... Ambrose Bierce Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.... Ambrose Bierce Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.... Ambrose Bierce Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.... Ambrose Bierce Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees ... Ambrose Bierce Confidante. One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confi... Ambrose Bierce Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves ... Ambrose Bierce Genealogy, n. An account of one's descent from a man who d... Ambrose Bierce What this country needs what every country needs occasiona... Ambrose Bierce Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on be... Ambrose Bierce Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out... Ambrose Bierce Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.... Ambrose Bierce Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of w... Ambrose Bierce Ardor, n. The quality that distinguishes love without know... Ambrose Bierce Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and t... Ambrose Bierce Doubt, indulged and cherished, is in danger of becoming de... Ambrose Bierce Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to ma... Ambrose Bierce Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates wha... Ambrose Bierce Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is ... Ambrose Bierce Suffrage, noun. Expression of opinion by means of a ballot... Ambrose Bierce War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.... Ambrose Bierce Battle, n., A method of untying with the teeth a political... Ambrose Bierce The slightest acquaintance with history shows that powerfu... Andy Rooney Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most o... Ann Landers Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most ... Cyril Connolly The artist one day falls through a hole in the brambles, a... Cyril Connolly It is only in the country that we can get to know a person... Art Buchwald You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a ... B. C. Forbes Real riches are the riches possessed inside.... B. C. Forbes He who has faith has... an inward reservoir of courage, ho... B. C. Forbes The man who has done his level best... is a success, even ... B. C. Forbes If you don't drive your business, you will be driven out o... Bill Vaughan The Vice-Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the... Bill Vaughan It's hard for the modern generation to understand Thoreau,... Bill Vaughan Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's... Bill Vaughan Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, t... Bill Vaughan Man is the animal that intends to shoot himself out into i... Bill Vaughan Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of... Bill Vaughan The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possib... Bill Vaughan Muscles come and go; flab lasts.... Bill Vaughan The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do jus... Bill Vaughan Economists report that a college education adds many thous... Bob Verdi The bell that tolls for all in boxing belongs to a cash re... Bob Verdi What's unfortunate about buying a pitcher for $12 million ... Calvin Trillin I never did very well in math - I could never seem to pers... Carl T. Rowan We emphasize that we believe in change because we were bor... Charles Krauthammer Every two years the American politics industry fills the a... Charles Kuralt You can find your way across this country using burger joi... Dave Barry The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, ... Dave Barry Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to ... Dave Barry The Internet is the most important single development in t... Dave Barry It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cho... Dave Barry Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with ... David Brinkley A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with... David Frost Don't aim for success if you want it; just do what you lov... David Grayson Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I... Edward R. Murrow We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home.... Edward R. Murrow Difficulty is the excuse history never accepts.... Edward R. Murrow A satellite has no conscience.... Edward R. Murrow The newest computer can merely compound, at speed, the old... Elmer Davis Applause, mingled with boos and hisses, is about all that ... Erma Bombeck Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They ... Erma Bombeck When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hop... Erma Bombeck Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Kel... Erma Bombeck Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers ... Erma Bombeck It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone e... Erma Bombeck When humor goes, there goes civilization.... Erma Bombeck The art of never making a mistake is crucial to motherhood... Erma Bombeck You hear a lot of dialogue on the death of the American fa... Fran Lebowitz Andy Warhol made fame more famous.... Fran Lebowitz Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.... Fran Lebowitz Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is there... Fran Lebowitz You're only has good as your last haircut.... Gene Fowler He has a profound respect for old age. Especially when it'... George Will World War II was the last government program that really w... George Will As advertising blather becomes the nation's normal idiom, ... George Will The future has a way of arriving unannounced.... George Will The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are cons... George Will Conservatives define themselves in terms of what they oppo... George Will Voters don't decide issues, they decide who will decide is... George Will The unpleasant sound Bush is emitting as he traipses from ... George Will All God's chillun got shoes or can get them in Mrs Marcos'... George Will Stalin's henchman Molotov, 96, died old and in bed, a priv... George Will A society that thinks the choice between ways of living is... George Will Childhood is frequently a solemn business for those inside... George Will There may be more poetry than justice in poetic justice.... George Will Pessimism is as American as apple pie-frozen apple pie wit... George Will Scholars concede but cannot explain the amazing chemistry ... George Will Some parents say it is toy guns that make boys warlike. Bu... George Will Today more Americans are imprisoned for drug offenses than... George Will Whatever right the Second Amendment protects is not as imp... George Will Football incorporates the two worst elements of American s... George Will You really don't want a president who is a football fan. F... George Will The reformers' preferred metaphor is "leveling the playing... George Will Being elected to Congress is regarded as being sent on a l... George Will Baseball, it is said, is only a game. True. And the Grand ... George Will If you seek Hamilton's monument, look around. You are livi... George Will The pursuit of perfection often impedes improvement.... George Will In the lexicon of the political class, the word "sacrifice... George Will Politicians fascinate because they constitute such a parad... George Will Football brings out the sociologist that lurks in some oth... George Will Leadership is, among other things, the ability to inflict ... Graham Greene Champagne, if you are seeking the truth, is better than a ... Grantland Rice Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about you... Hal Borland A woodland in full color is awesome as a forest fire, in m... Hal Borland You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a s... Hal Borland Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowi... Hendrik Willem Van Loon The arts are an even better barometer of what is happening... Hendrik Willem Van Loon Somewhere in the world there is an epigram for every dilem... Herb Caen A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bi... Heywood Broun Sports do not build character. They reveal it.... Hugh Sidey A sense of humor... is needed armor. Joy in one's heart an... Hunter S. Thompson When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.... Irvin S. Cobb As I understand it, sport is hard work for which you do no... Irvin S. Cobb Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pant... Italo Calvino A classic is a book that has never finished saying what it... Jack Anderson The incestuous relationship between government and big bus... Jacob August Riis The more I live, the more I think that humor is the saving... James Fallows Always write angry letters to your enemies. Never mail the... James Patrick Murray Baseball is a game where a curve is an optical illusion, a... Jane Howard Anthropology was the science that gave her the platform fr... Jim Bishop Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose... Kin Hubbard Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn'... Kin Hubbard Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn int... Kin Hubbard We would all like to vote for the best man but he is never... Linda Ellerbee People are pretty much alike. It's only that our differenc... Mary Schmich Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.... Mary Schmich The movies we love and admire are to some extent a functio... Mary Schmich You can map your life through your favorite movies, and no... Mignon McLaughlin There is always some specific moment when we become aware ... Mignon McLaughlin It's the most unhappy people who most fear change.... Mignon McLaughlin It is important to our friends to believe that we are unre... Mignon McLaughlin A successful marriage requires falling in love many times,... Mignon McLaughlin If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, ... Mignon McLaughlin Society honors its living conformists and its dead trouble... Mignon McLaughlin A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles... Paul Harvey Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and wr... Robert Quillen If we wish to make a new world we have the material ready.... Russell Baker Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse tha... Russell Baker Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reaso... Russell Baker I gave up on new poetry myself thirty years ago, when most... Russell Baker An educated person is one who has learned that information... Russell Baker Ah, summer, what power you have to make us suffer and like... Russell Baker Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into th... Sydney J. Harris If a small thing has the power to make you angry, does tha... Sydney J. Harris The real danger is not that computers will begin to think ... Sydney J. Harris The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into win... Sydney J. Harris Democracy is the only system that persists in asking the p... Sydney J. Harris Almost no one is foolish enough to imagine that he automat... Ted Koppel History is a tool used by politicians to justify their int... Theodore White If you make a living, if you earn your own money, you're f... Theodore White I saw Chungking for the first time more than 40 years ago ... Theodore White The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a po... Tom Brokaw It's easy to make a buck. It's a lot tougher to make a dif... Tom Brokaw You are educated. Your certification is in your degree. Yo... Walter Lippmann The final test of a leader is that he leaves behind him in... Walter Lippmann The genius of a good leader is to leave behind him a situa... Walter Lippmann It requires wisdom to understand wisdom: the music is noth... Walter Lippmann The radical novelty of modern science lies precisely in th... Walter Winchell Nothing recedes like success....

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